July 15, 2009 Jason

My Fatherhood Experience (again)

Man…where do I begin? It was July 12th, a Sunday. I was preparing myself to go to church when I went into the living room, only to see my wife sitting on the couch. I asked her why she was on the couch. “Contractions” she said. So, we packed bags and suitcases, updated our facebooks, and eventually left.  On the drive to the hospital, she only had one contraction.  In my mind, I was like “false alarm. They’re gonna send us home.”  We get to the hospital around 11am-ish. My son (Jeremiah) and I was waiting in the waiting room, making small talk. I told my wife to text or call me with updates, but no response. Then a nurse came out and said “she moved upstairs…7 centimeters!” I nearly jumped out my skin and called my friend to pick up Jeremiah. Once she got fully dialated, it only took 20 minutes of pushing and “ta da” my lil [pending adorable nickname] arrived 12 days early. Ironically on a Sunday, my wife gave birth again. Miss A’Niyah Imani Capron [insert last name] came in at 5lbs 11.4oz and 17.75in long. When I saw her, my first thought was…wow, a lot of hair again (like her brother). Then I realized that she looked different from her brother. My wife ended up pointing out that A’Niyah looks just like me. Upon realizing that, I immediately dropped the “tough dad” persona, and melted.  I even caught myself treating her like a delicate glass figurine. When her brother (Jeremiah) walked in to see his new baby sister, I was like…whoa! Dude is growing up! It just hit me that he wasn’t a baby anymore.

As I was going to and fro, I noticed this young guy. He couldn’t be no older than 18.  He honestly looked 16.  Anyway, his hair was an ungroomed afro, and his attire was 5 sizes too big.  Now, most fathers in the hospital rocked a bracelet with your child’s info on it. It’s a very distinct bracelet that the hospital gives you, and needless to say, this dude had one as well. It’s like the judgemental monkey hopped on my back and say “yaw, yaw…judge him! Judge him!!!” And his friend with a black-n-mild didn’t help the matter. Neither did their “ice grills” they were giving me.  Tho I was happy that he took some kind of responsibility and showed up for the birth of his child, I seriously saw the lack of concept concerning longevity. As a dad, that concerned me, because it seemed like this new child doesn’t have a chance, but once again…that judgemental monkey wore the mask of truth and I was hoodwinked into the vices that the monkey had to offer.

Overall, my experience was bittersweet. I know I’ve talked about the sweet part of it, but let me breifly talk about the bitter part of it.  I tried not to think about it, but driving a “now” family of 4 back to an apartment was NOT part of the plan. As bad as I wanted to drive to a house, I just can’t right now, and that hurts. It also hurts that our families live so far away. I’m thankful for the close friends I have, but I really miss our families. When weighing the pros and cons, the cons are temporary and the pros are permanent. One day, we will get our house, and both of our families are very interested in moving to Tulsa, so everything is a waiting game.

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Comments (4)

  1. jaye mayes

    i love it!!! what ever happened to the young dad?? did you talk to him???!!! and lastly the thing about things being temporary is that they only last for awhile there short term things God will you and your families the desires of your HEART!!! so ask brother its yours!!!

  2. Laura

    I don’t know you from Adam. I ran across your blog because I was looking up “Fatherhood Figurines” on google, and your blog had those words in the text. But I’m touched by what you wrote. I’m a parent also, and my children have touched my life in ways I couldn’t dream possible. Thanks for your beautiful reminder of the love family brings, and God Speed. May you one day have all of your dreams come true.

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